THANKFULNESS

 Joel had a short Friday, but a good one. And he got 2 more cards in the mail encouraging him and praising that he was back at work. HOW SWEET that he's still being thought of and lifted in prayer and letting him know. He knows, but it's nicer to know that way, right?

Bill got out to the opry tonight. He looks so good, just needs a little more color in his cheeks.  I am so thankful that he is getting better. I love him!!!!!! Carol and Peggy brought him out.  I really don't know what we'd do without Carol. She is an amazing cook, sister, cook, dog sitter, cook  house sitter, cook, caregiver, and cook. I love her, too!!!!  And so does my dog, and Betty Boyd's dogs, and any other dog that comes near her. She's like the dog whisperer. Not a cook whisperer, tho. She would be a cook screamerer. TOO GOOD!!!!


This is the time of year that I start having a harder and harder time dealing with "things". I have to really focus on ONE DAY AT A TIME and sometimes moments. I'm not sure exactly why, but one thing is, I HATE this time change. It gets so dark when I still want to be doing stuff. Another is seeing all the rush to get the Christmas stuff out knowing that so many are either without the real knowledge of why Christmas is celebrated or don't care and so many get caught up in the commercialization. I just get my thoughts going all over the place. SO.......to help focus on more positive &  uplifting  things, I felt like this would be a perfect time & way........  blog about what I am truly thankful for. I know that once my brain starts going there, I will have to do this on a "to be continued" format. And there will probably be lots and lots of typos due to tears. I wish that I had thought to start this for the month of November on a daily basis. Maybe I can try to get the first 10 days caught up and go from there. As chatty as I get, that may be a little much. We will see......

I am not proud of and am in no way making light of or flaunting some of what I have been through that I share in some of my stories. I share these hoping that someone will be helped sometime, somewhere. I found out a long time ago that I did not have a patent on things that I was going through. I had the attitude that I was "the only one" and didn't want to talk about some things. When I did open up, I discovered that someone else had gone through the same thing AND survived AND didn't let it forever sink them. They may have been down for the count, but they got up....and lived.....One Day At A Time. 
So....if you are interested, read on.

The first thing that I am thankful for is knowing and experiencing the saving grace of our Lord Jesus Christ in April 1973. Up to that time, our lives weren't "pretty" and we were a mess, as a family. I had decided to file for divorce from Joel.  A friend brought me a Guidepost book to read and one of the stories had such an amazing true story of compassion and forgiveness from a family that had suffered the death of a young child.  I knew that I wanted to be like the people that I was reading about. It's hard to understand how the death of one's child can benefit someone else in getting their life totally turned around for the better, but I couldn't and haven't forgotten that story. It had a huge impact on my life's altering decisions. Also, our 4 year old son, Jody, (he's gonna, so not like me using his "mommy" name; he now goes by Joel)  was attending a church with friends and he was always coming up with questions about God, Jesus, Heaven, etc. I would stumble around and answer him with what I could remember from the times that I had attended church as a child or from what my great grandmother had told me.
The first question he'd asked was, "who is Jesus?". I remember stammering around telling him that Jesus was a man that lived long ago and that He lived in heaven now.  Jody asked if He was going to come to our house and I replied, "maybe, someday." He got so excited and asked, "could it be today?" and  no sooner had I thought that I'd gotten past that heavy discussion, our door bell rang. He tore off to the door hollering, "there He is!  It's Jesus!"  I was telling him, that it wasn't and to settle down. When I opened the door, Jody acted really disappointed because it was, "just" two ladies from Travis Baptist Church that were "just out visiting". I told them what we'd just been discussing and they said, "well, in a way, Jesus did come." Sure made me think. I had plans to go to church that next Sunday, but didn't. I fell back into my mess of a life.
A few weeks later....
The next "big" question, Jody came home with was, "Did you know that I can ask Jesus for anything?" Again, I tried explaining, to a way too smart 4 yr. old, my take on things trying to reason with him, but he kept saying that he knew that he could ask for anything.  A few days later, as he was saying his prayers, he announced what he was asking God for...........a baby.  As far as I was concerned, that couldn't happen. I was already miserable in a marriage, I was trying to finish Beauty School, and I'd already had 4 pregnancies. Doc said, "no more."
Speeding past the next few questions & months......
I'd found out (with GREAT surprise) that I was pregnant and we'd decided to keep it from Jody, in case things went badly. When it was obvious that Mommy was getting bigger, we broke the news to him, thinking that he'd forgotten that it was his prayer request. The first thing he said was, "I knew it, I asked God, I told you."  As we started making plans and getting things ready, Jody made another one of his profound  announcements....".It was gonna be a girl." He was praying for a 'girl sister.'
Our friends would tease him over the next few weeks and try to get him to think that it was a brother, a boy, NO GIRL, but he would always say, "no, I asked God, it's a girl." One night, while we had some friends over, Jody was being teased about it and he never wavered. Joel and I joined in on the teasing. (I am not proud of it, but hang with me, you'll read about God's amazing love.) After I put him to bed and came back to our guests, they were talking about how adamant he was about it being a girl. Joel made the remark, "yeah, and I want her to have green eyes and dimples" and the I added, "yeah, I want her to have curly hair."
Fast forward again,
The morning that my mom woke Jody up to tell him the baby had arrived and did he want to know what it was, he said, "I know. It's a girl!" My mom asked him how he knew that and he said, "Because, I asked God real hard, one more time before I went to sleep."
I had already been under conviction about my mess of a life and knew that things needed to and were going to have to change.The moment that Wendi was born, I saw 3 little curls right in the nape of her neck.  Joel wasn't at the hospital when she was born. He'd gone to celebrate, early.....(part of our, then, problems.) When he did show up, he walked in saying, "you got your girl." When I mentioned the curls, he told me that she was bald. The rest of the night I would think about the curls that I thought I had seen and guessed that I just dreamed it, because I wanted a "sign" from God, so badly. When he came back the next morning during regular visiting hours, we went to the nursery together. There she lay.....bald as the palm of your hand, but she had dimples!  Later, when they brought her to me, I discovered the curls!!!!  I knew for sure that things were going to change. I knew that too many "coincidences" had happened in too short of a time and they happen for a reason.  If you saw her today, you'd be amazed. She has the green eyes, the dimples, and the beautiful curly hair.
I've heard several times through out their lives, Jody saying out of frustration......."and I prayed for her" or "I prayed for this?" 
Because of the Guidepost story and  a 4 yr. old's faith, due to sweet friends that would faithfully come and pick him up and take him to church, we were led by a child.
The night before my life was to change forever, Joel had asked me what I was going to do the next day, which would be Easter Sunday. I told him that I thought that I was going to go to church. Surprisingly, he wanted to go, too. I remember smarting off to him about going to get drunk. I don't remember the sermon, I just remember the conviction that I felt and that desire to change things. As soon as the altar call started, I was asking Jesus to forgive my sins and come into my heart. He did and He did. We've still had some bumpy rides, but we know Who to go to, now.  I am still a sinner, but a sinner saved by GRACE.
God blessed us 4 yrs. after Wendi with another son.  We didn't pray for any special specifics like the curly hair, green eyes, dimples, 10 toes, button nose, etc. We just prayed that we'd have a son that would grow up and serve God. We still hold all 3 of them up in prayer, along with our 10 amazing and beautiful grand kids and a great grand son.
NO, not all of my prayers have been answered to my liking or my request, but enough of them have been, so  I have the faith to keep praying.
I don't know why God would give me the honor of being the mother to three very precious people. Each one is so smart, so giving, so caring,  & so loving in their own way. Each is so different. You'd think that they were born to different families and just appeared with us. I love, love, love them. I've not always liked what they were doing, but I sure never quit loving them, nor will I.
So...to boil all this down......
I am Most Thankful for my salvation,
Thankful that I can talk to God anytime, anywhere, about anything,
Thankful for not going through with the divorce,
Thankful that Joel's stuck with me these 45 yrs.,
Thankful that 3 wonderful kids call me Mom ,
Thankful that I'm "Nana" to 10 wonderful grand kids,
Thankful for being a great grandmother,
Thankful that Joel's back at work,
Thankful for my friends,
Thankful for my dog,
and
Thankful for the word, 'ENCOURAGE'.
Now, I am thankful that I'm heading towards my pillow.
Love and Prayers to all!
Suzie